In light of the unspeakable tragedy of the terrorist attacks on our nation, problems in our own lives seem extremely insignificant. Traumas that rock only our own private worlds seem trivial in proportion to the terrorist act which has rocked the entire world. But our God is God of the small and personal even as He is God of the big and worldwide. He created and sustains each atom with just as much love and wisdom as He oversees the unfathomly perfect order of the universe.

July 30, 1999

Dear Friends,

Last year your thoughtfulness and encouragement were a very real blessing after my violin accident. You never realize until trauma hits what a treasure empathy is from family and friends. Thank you so very much.

At first, the shock of seeing my violin crushed in, the top in seventeen pieces, the sound post poking through the top, and the bow broken, kept me from crying for about an hour. But the enormity of the loss and the awful financial waste soon became overwhelming. I know that the Lord wants us to hold on to material things lightly. But the playing of the violin was a way to worship God and lead others toward Him. It was so dear to my soul, and as far as I could imagine, this violin was irreplaceable.

We had purchased this 1857 J.B. Vuillaume instrument in 1967 for only $3,000, and it had increased in value to between $75,000 and $100,000. Incidentally, Stradivarius violins, which are the best, are now selling for between 3 and 4 million dollars. I guess you have to take into consideration the artistic and antique value, but it was the Japanese getting into the violin marketplace which drove up the prices in the last 30 years. Of course, we never intended to sell this instrument but to continue throughout my life using it in praise to the Lord.

To find a violin that had anywhere close to the quality and tone of my Vuillaume would be a financial impossibility for us. My grief was tremendous.

As I am sure that you know, whenever the Lord takes us through an experience that breaks us, the Holy Spirit lovingly pours out the lessons to be learned. I realized that even though I guarded the violin carefully, I am human and make mistakes. As the violin increased in value over the 30 years I owned it, I would never allow it out of my sight, taking it into restaurants, gas stations, even seat-belting it into the back seat of the car.

It was a comfort when some of my friends called in disbelief saying, “This accident is impossible! You care for that violin like a baby!” Now I learned that even though you can take care of something nearly perfectly for so many years, it is still human to make mistakes and have unthinkable accidents. This is when the Lord’s priceless, invaluable, perfect mercy floods in. I desperately need my Heavenly Father’s perfection.

When this first happened, I thought, “Lord, am I doing something wrong? Are you trying to get my attention?” I asked the Holy Spirit to check every corner of my life, and he pricked my conscience in areas that needed pruning and growing, but I could not discover any wrongs that merited a whopping blow like this one. So I asked the Lord, “Well, then, why? I’ve given this instrument to You; it’s used in Your ministry; and I know that all protection comes from You.” For the last several years before each of my practice sessions I had knelt down to thank God for such a good violin with which to glorify Him. I even did one more thing to assure that it would never become an idol; I placed it on the “altar of sacrifice” in prayer, because using it for the Lord is my priority in life next to my relationship with God and my family. It seems that the Lord was testing my word and my sincerity.

I think that it is okay to ask ‘why?’ Throughout the whole Bible God’s servants asked Him ‘why?’ King David, especially in Psalm 89; Job, when he lost everything; and even Jesus asked His Father, “Why have you forsaken me?” Jesus asked even though He knew the answers to ‘why?’ Goodness sakes! He had invented the answers! But He still called out ‘why?’ That’s one way I know He was fully human as well as God.

Martha asked ‘why’ of Jesus when He hadn’t arrived in time to heal her brother Lazarus. He had purposely stayed away until Lazarus died because He had a plan way beyond Lazarus’ illness and death...namely, Lazarus’ resurrection, which would give His followers hope when God allowed Jesus to be unprotected and die. But Jesus still cried when He saw Lazarus’ friends’ and sisters’ grief...even though He knew what His plan was. That’s another way I know He was fully human. He cries along with us in our grief and understands our limits which make it impossible to perceive His bigger plan.

God did provide an adequate violin with a sweet sound and a bow for the year, so we didn’t have to buy a substitute. It was the last one we had left from my family’s student days. It became my chance to be content in little as well as much. I was so thankful for it.

My most devastating grief was the horrible financial waste of losing something we’d have to literally sell our house to replace. I knew the poorer quality of sound of less valuable violins. And I thought, “God, how can so much money be spent on what?--a violin?--when there are so many other practical needs?” I mean, there are missionaries and their projects to support, churches to be built and maintained, evangelistic outreaches everywhere that need money, famines and refugees and desperately needy people all over the world. How could I be thinking about a $75,000 to $100,000 violin even one with antique value and a superb quality tone! It did not make sense.

But I remembered Jesus’ baffling example of Mary and Martha. Martha. . . serving Jesus in such practical ways; Mary spending time conversing with Jesus. John 11:5 says that Jesus loved Martha and her sister, but when Martha complained about Mary not helping her with her practical service, Jesus told Martha that Mary’s choice of spending time fellowshipping with Him was more important than working for Him, and eternally--not just temporally--valuable.

Then Mary did the unthinkable. It was something that seemed ludicrously wasteful. Instead of washing Jesus’ feet in the normal way with inexpensive water, she poured perfume worth a year’s wages on Him. A YEAR’S WAGES! It could have fed and clothed a multitude of poor, desperate people or maybe financed Jesus’ and His disciples’ traveling ministry. But Jesus was so pleased with her lavish worship He said that the story of her devotion and act of sacrifice would go down in history. Not even practical Martha complained about Mary’s extravagance. Only one person objected--Judas.

So I have painfully learned a vivid lesson in not worrying about what seems practical or impractical in showing my love for Jesus. No expense should be spared where God is the center of worship. And He should have the very best. He spared no expense in loving us! He spent the life of His only Son on us!

Well, it turned out that my violin was repairable after all. It took a year and over $13,000. The Lord found us a master craftsman. When it was finished a month ago, and I saw how it looked and how wonderful it sounded, mom, dad, and I all cried. We couldn’t thank the Lord enough. You cannot tell that the violin has ever been broken. There are no interruptions even in the grain of the wood in spite of how cracked up it was.

We asked Bill Webster, the highly skilled and experienced master repairman, who lives in Edgartown, Massachusetts how in the world he could do such a perfect job! He said that everything just seemed to go right. He did not realize how many people were praying for him while he worked. He said that the violin might even sound better. He found when he went into the instrument that it had been in a previous accident. He could tell that the soundpost had come up through the top before, and the wood was left very weak in that area. There was even wood missing; so he patiently took a year to fix it right. Some of my friends told me that they thought that this accident was a miracle story in the making.

I have been using it as an analogy that God may sometimes allow us to have “breaking” experiences so that we can become even better after His patient, masterful, miraculous repair of our lives.

My bow cannot be repaired. It was broken in half. So we are trusting the Lord for one that will match my Vuillaume well. A bow and a violin must vibrate or harmonize together. Some say the bow is as important as the violin itself. He is the faithful provider and His timing is never off.

My violin is worth less now. But that does not matter to me. It is not for sale! I will never give it up! It makes me think of this analogy that we may feel devalued by severe, shattering experiences, which we go through--family problems, natural disasters, blows to our health or finances, the devastation of divorce or even death. But the Lord is the master craftsman. He can repair us in just the right way, and He will never give us up. He loves us just the same as before.

The best way I can thank you and all those who cared about my ordeal this year is to rely more and more on God’s faithfulness and perfect love. I love Him with all my heart, and this treasured violin will keep on praising only Him.

Lovingly in Jesus,


Beverly Murk Psalm 73:25 "Whom have I in Heaven but You? And earth has nothing I desire besides You."

Currents Thoughts:

Sharing my heart about the violin album songs.

Former Thoughts:

Violin Tragedy
The Love Chapter Part I
The Love Chapter Part II
Songs from the violin album.
Morning Devotions
Developing talents and using them for God.

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